Posted in Love

Not Bridget Jones’s Diary

I have always known that the one for me would be able to make a decent cup of tea, work out at least twice a week and went to church not only at Christmas and Easter but every Sunday ( or at least tried if he is a pilot or something).

I wanted him tall because who else was going to let me rest my watermelon head on his chest than the one that has been aimlessly walking around with a missing rib.

Gosh, I was such a romantic and a prayerful one at that. I thought ours would be the perfect love story -meet in high school, go to varsity, get great jobs and get whisked away to Paris for the perfect engagement😂somebody should have woken me up at high school 😂😭

But nobody did, so I walked around with a full daydream perfect for Hallmark in my head (watermelon head). I had so many questions like “Wasnt I ready for him”, ” Did my parents let the cows eat in the sangoma’s maize field”, ” was I cursed”.

I had questions like a fully teethed human that just stopped diaper patrol. I looked for him in ‘almost me right”, “mr I am not over my ex” and “mr I kinda want you because the one I want is going through a phase”.

As I write this, I am five seconds from signing up on Christian Mingle. I wish he could send me a signal to let me know he was out there. It’s kinda getting lonely out here .

Written for Nneka

Image patheos


One thought on “Not Bridget Jones’s Diary

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