Disclaimer: This blog post is one’s girl take on friendship and you are advised to read with caution.
Since forever I have always wanted a BEST FRIEND, so sad right!? I just wanted that one person I could app at midnight to talk about MR-I-WON’t-CALL-YOU and that one person that would send a 1000 emojis five minutes after I drop my Martha Stewart inspired pie in their inbox. I never got that one special person but I got that one person in 3 people (talk about blessed) but you are WELCOME to try and be my YIN to my YANG-I promise I cook a mean pie in the whole greater Anci state 😂
In the search for my Jonathan to David (yep I stoned a whole Goliath), I met a whole lot of shady people that didn’t really want me as a friend but more like a doormat. So here are my 5 signs your BFF ain’t really your friend.
- They Hit You Up Every time They Want Money
I have this one girl that rarely says hie or butt-dial me (I know right!) but the moment girl wants a little dollar to splurge on who knows what, she starts dropping “Girl, hey” and calling me “Honey Boo”. Nah Fam! If they ain’t checking on you every week (because sometimes we get busy) they ain’t your friends better recognize the person that sees an ATM when they see your name.
2. They send the shortest Happy Birthday in History Three Weeks Later
Nothing sucks than getting an “HBD” from a supposed friend when they supposed to write a whole cheesy novel on your birthday. Three weeks later? Is this the rebirth? Don’t waste your energy on someone who doesn’t celebrate your birthday like it’s theirs but expect you to do something for you (umm, double standard much?)
3. The girl always has mouth rage
You can’t even remember the last time they psyched you up. Like proper cheer stuff with pom poms. They always remind you that your thighs are too fat, your voice too loud and your mannerisms too annoying. Girl needs to go!.
4. She Always Turning Up For Stuff Without You
Please be patient while I explain this-of course you are not a handbag or bracelet but if you guys ain’t hanging out together except for mandatory things such as church, are your friends? Nothing sucks than seeing your friend show up to something she said she didn’t wanna go to but thankfully her IG stories say otherwise.
5. You feel lonely
The moment you feel like it’s just “YOU” against the world girl you might be in friendship by yourself.
Till next time, stay sippin’ and happy.