Posted in Love

Off Layer

Who doesn’t love a man that knows the difference between a swiss roll and croissants? Definitely not me! So my heart was in for a rude awakening when I bumped into the ‘perfect’ man in the bakery section of the supermarket. It was cheat day ( which day isn’t?) and I was hunting for the biggest swiss roll ( I am sorry not sorry diet) when he came and stood by me. He smelt like jasmine and freshly baked cinnamon cookies -perfection. I pretended to be occupied for a minute because I tend to be a little clumsy or rant off in Chinese when nervous. But it was cinnamon so I had to look because of FOMO. You guys, I looked up to the moistest chocolate cake in the history of deli trips🙈. My throat at that moment decided to be clogged with saliva- I wasn’t about to swallow this sight lest I stumble and slip on my diet. He smiled at me and he could have asked me for a million dollars and I would have sent him my niece’s monopoly money. He made his order and for all the swiss rolls in the world, I would have been his fresh cream coating😂 Eyy romantic lovers don’t get your hopes high, he didn’t say anything to me. I left with my cheat day snacks for a meeting at church and bam wham he was there. Dude was employed and had a side hustle not forgetting his food preferences that were awesome as well- I was signing up for this diet. He asked for my number and we got talking 😊. Dude apped and called ( like who calls anymore?) but I should have gone home when that black cat crossed the road. I am highly superstitious so black cats scare me (or cats in general). I thought my prayer life was on fleek so nothing bad was gonna happen. But something bad did happen? He found out I wasn’t 23 and he high tailed and forgot his dignity. Like who does that? I am sure I look put together 😂 I can’t possibly look like I have 7 great-grandchildren right? I was in disbelief 😢 Does one become an off layer when they pass 25? He ghosted me and I didn’t bother hitting send on any message? I seriously have concerns about my body and face now, am I ageing faster like Benjamin Button (the reverse that is) oh goodness. I wonder if he will ever explain why my age scared him👐✍ Could I already be an off-layer?

Please sip  ➡This story happened to a friend of mine who shared her story with us at the Dessert Club or it’s my story who knows. The Dessert Club meets every Friday for all you can eat dessert🍰🍩☕🍸 Follow me on Twitter @heyanci, Instagram @koffeekweenzw

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