A perfect weekend for me consists of pizza with extra cheese , mango juice (cold) and ice cream on a rainy day in blankets and freshly scented flowers. How perfect would life be if we could get everything we wished for.
I have never had a perfect weekend unless it’s a solo date that usually ends up with me with a book ,a meal and a bag full of candy.
I thought when you confided in someone they would routinely check in to ensure you are okay. Cue “count on me” the banger from Waiting to exhale for this part . God knows I have a mouth that pours into people and that talks when in pain. I told my friends my ailment and I could possibly be dead.
There is an I in group and I have found it. Every day I wake up I do not expect a lit group chat , a funny meme, a GIF that will crack me up because I have no tribe. I have been the girl that visited everyone in hospital, texted non-stop ,prayed for the ailed but it’s my turn and it’s just me and Ed Sheeran .
To be honest I was crippled that people could have lunch dates without me ,move on and get on the bus without me. It’s heartbreaking when the world moves and you remain stagnant .
I however have learnt the art of the shuuush. I no longer speak of the pain I experience ,the sadness that harbours within or the fears howling at the door because there is no silence as painful as that of a friend.
As I continue to be a yogi and a carb lover my Eat,Pray and Love journey has begun. First up is Italy and my tummy is ready for all the pizza that I can eat .
I leave you with the following words:
To those struggling remember you are not alone
To those that feel alone the hummingbird will hum in the morning
To those living with pain ,healing will come at dawn
Remember it’s okay to not have a tribe,show up for yourself and love yourself intentionally